Oxymorons

Being the sucker I am for:

a) books
and
b) quotes,

then it stands to reason I especially love
c) quote books.

It makes me feel smart to say something smart, even though the smart thing came from someone else's smart head (the only thing that comes from mine is smart-aleck).

Anyway, I decided (after being re-inspired by a recent movie quote post on a now-favorite blog that I've stalked, I mean found) that when my particular day yields nothing more to post than:

a) I sold pump parts today and
b) I sold air compressor parts today,

that quotes would be a good thing to share. Could be book quotes, might be movie quotes, maybe even TV quotes, but quotes it will be.

So today's post includes some from my "Oxymoronica" quote book that was purchased from my favorite addiction - Barnes and Noble (and y'all thought I only went there for the shortbread cookies and hot chocolate).

From: oxymoronica, by Dr. Mardy Grothe (paradoxical wit and wisdom from history's greatest wordsmiths) (I love this book, y'all really need to get you one).

"You'd be surprised how much it costs to look this cheap." Dolly Parton;

"I love mankind - it's people I can't stand." Charles M. Schulz;

"It infuriates me to be wrong when I know I'm right." Moliere;

"Some people can stay longer in an hour than others can in a week." William Dean Howells;

"Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else." Margaret Meade;

"As for consulting a dentist regularly, my punctuality practically amounted to a fetish. Every twelve years I would drop whatever I was doing and allow wild Caucasian ponies to drag me to a reputable orthodontist." S. J. Perelman;

"You can't say civilization isn't advancing, in every war they kill you in a new way." Will Rogers;

"The value of marriage is not that adults produce children, but that children produce adults." Peter De Vries

"We learn from history that we do not learn from history." George Hegel;

"Few things are harder to put up with than the annoyance of a good example." Mark Twain;

"I have never let my schooling interfere with my education." Mark Twain;"

"Nothing is more irritating than not being invited to a party you wouldn't be seen dead at." Bill Vaughan;

"I told the doctor I was overtired, anxiety-ridden, compulsively active, constantly depressed, with recurring fits of paranoia. Turns out I'm normal." Jules Feiffer