Ouch, That Kinda Hurt

About 21 years ago, we moved "up North" 3 or 4 days after Christmas, and I remember 3 things about our 1st night here:

1st) It was cold in the house;

2nd) We didn't have any of our stuff because the moving truck wasn't due until the next day;

3rd) I met our next door neighbor for the 1st time and she told her 8th grade age son to come over (in the dark) and show us where to turn on our water (on the outside).

Why I remember that 3rd thing so well, I don't know.  But I remember it.

As stated, the son was in the 8th grade at the time.  My girls were in 1st grade and pre-school at that time.

And being as he was:

a) a boy &

b) an 8th grader,

we could hear the basketball bouncing on the pavement just about every night.  Winter, summer, spring and fall.  For a good many years.  We could hear the basketball bouncing.

Now, a basketball hitting the driveway is one of those sounds that you don't realize isn't there any more.  Not even when years and years pass without you hearing it.

You don't even realize you haven't heard it for years, until by chance, you hear it again.

And I heard it again this past Friday night.

I went out to the car to get something out, and I heard the basketball bouncing on the pavement at the next door neighbor's house.

The outside light was on just like way, way back.  So the basketball bouncer could see how to bounce.

And that sound brought  a thousand memories to mind in a split second.

And I won't lie.  Some of them hurt.

The 8th-grader grew up, of course.  Moved out of the house.  Eventually got married and started his own family.  I'm thinking it was his son bouncing the basketball Friday night.  He's probably 11 or 12 by now.

My own girls have grown up and moved on.

All this is as it should be.

But the memory that squeezed the hardest, was the 8th-grader's mother.

I didn't realize it that night that we moved here, but she was in the middle of chemo treatments for breast cancer.  They had a pool and during the summer she had some friends over to play in the pool.  One lady had come down the slide and somehow hit my neighbor in the chest.  And somehow, that prompted a lump to show up that had undoubtedly been lurking there unseen for a while.  So by the time we moved here 4 days after Christmas, she was going through chemo.

She had the most positive, don't complain about my problems, attitude that I've ever seen.

The breast cancer went into remission.  And I had one of the best friends I'll ever have. 

Eventually, she went back to work, and she was busy, and I was busy, but we would walk together in the evenings when we could.  And she would make me laugh.  Alot.

Sometimes, I would go over to her house on Sunday evenings and we would laugh and gossip for a while.  Just the two of us.  And she would make me laugh.  Alot.

A few years later, cancer reared its ugly head again.  This time in her hip.

She went through chemo again.  And the tumor didn't go away.  It just didn't get any bigger.

She didn't go back to work that time.  She had to go on disability.  So we didn't go on walks together any more.  But she got around.  Driving.  Walking with a cane, but walking okay. 

And I would go over just about every Sunday evening.  Most times, she would have sent her husband up the road to hang out in the "Man Cave" with one of their friends.  But sometimes he would be there.  And that was fine, too.  Because she made me laugh.  Alot.  But the 2 of them together made me practically snort. 

We had neighborhood Christmas parties at their house.  Once, we had it at my house.  If you really want to be entertained, just try playing "Catch Phrase" with a room full of people who can't read the tiny print on cards any more and (some of them) can't half hear.  My girls were teenagers at the time, and I daresay, they would tell you right now, that was probably the most fun they've ever had at a party.  They were the only young people at the party.  All the rest of them were my age and older.  But my girls were highly entertained that night.

Eventually, the cancer ugliness started to spread.  And leaving the house became less and less of an option for her.

When my oldest daughter became engaged, we bought her wedding dress in September.  The wedding was in December. 

We went over one Sunday night in September for her to model it.

By October, the fight was over for my neighbor.

That was 8 years ago.

And I still miss her.  Especially on Sunday nights.

And last Friday night.  When I heard a basketball bouncing on the driveway.

And I won't lie.  It squeezed my heart pretty hard.